Four Horsemen Quiz Results Explained (Sample)

During arguments your partner is usually respectful and is rarely critical of your personality or behaviour. Personal criticism is often toxic within a relationship and is associated with higher rates of separation and divorce, so it's important to remain respectful during arguments and disagreements.

It's good that you don't feel that you're hurting one another when you discuss your core issues. There may however be a sense that you're in gridlock - that you're going around and around in circles without reaching any resolution. If this is the case then relationship counselling can help you to explore new behaviours within conflict, and potential new solutions.

When you argue with your partner they rarely accuse you of things you haven't done, or question your motivations. When you're in conflict with them there is still a sense that they maintain some respect towards you.

There are occasions when we all deserve to be criticised for our behaviour, but when you feel that the criticism is unjustified then that leads to hurt, anger, and sadness. At the moment you are in the fortunate position of feeling that your partner does not criticise you unjustly. Criticism may be present in your relationship but it is probably either justifiable or appropriate in terms of scope.

Your partner sometimes struggles to see your point of view. Perhaps they behave like they are somehow morally superior to you, or more intelligent than you. You may occasionally become frustrated because you feel that your voice isn't being heard or acknowledged within your relationship. Left unchecked, these frustrations often build into resentment.

Your partner usually understands the way you think and feel. When they talk about you they are usually pretty accurate in describing your thoughts and feelings - they don't misrepresent you.

Couples sometimes fall into the trap of a habit known as a harsh startup. This is when a discussion quickly turns into an argument because one or other of a couple begins to attack their partner with personal criticism. You've indicated that your partner does not display this bad habit - hopefully you also refrain from personally attacking your partner.

There is always a small element of deceit in even the best of relationships - what are known as white lies. Most people have held back thoughts that they think would hurt their partner unnecessarily. It's a different matter when your partner has lied to you consistently about important issues. If your relationship is going to have a chance of changing for the better then your partner will have to change their ways and stop the deceit in your relationship, or explain their motivations more fully. The issue of deceit needs to be brought out into the open and discussed, because serious secrets and lies within a relationship are toxic.

Really listening to your partner is something you need to focus upon if you want your relationship to work. That's going to be quite a challenge for you at the moment. It's going to take some real effort to start really acknowledging what your partner is saying to you.

You don't have too much difficulty in acknowledging your partner's point of view. It's likely that you are capable of accepting some influence from your partner which is important if your relationship is to thrive.

You mostly think that your partner is logical and rational when you are discussing things. Sometimes they may be a little too rational and logical. Perhaps their rational and logical approach is not a good fit with the way you think - you may be governed more by emotions or intuitive thinking. Understanding how you both behave when you disagree is part of the relationship counselling process.

You may have got to the point in your relationship where you don't want to hear many of the things that your partner has got to say. They may bore you with their conversation, they may frustrate you, they may annoy you, or they may enrage you. For whatever reason communication has likely broken down in your relationship and needs refocusing. If your relationship is to survive you need to start engaging with what your partner has to say, however difficult a prospect that may seem to you right now.

Most people enjoy receiving compliments about their appearance, even if it makes them feel awkward for a moment. When compliments are missing from a relationship it just adds to the sense of distance you feel from your partner.

It's important that you tell your partner when you feel or think strongly about an issue. Your survey responses indicate that when you argue with your partner you can hold back hurtful words that may come to mind. Maintaining a positive regard for your partner when you're in conflict is a good habit to maintain in your relationship.

Your partner is generally truthful and trustworthy within your relationship. This helps to make you think that it's worth working to improve your relationship because your partner is fundamentally a good person.

Sometimes a couple falls into the habit of calling one another names or swearing at one another. You've indicated that your partner behaves politely towards you. Hopefully you behave similarly towards your partner. Politeness within a relationship is important if your relationship is going to survive and thrive in the long term.

Your partner still provides you with kind words of affection and care. Words of love and affection matter in a relationship and ensuring that both partners understand this is part of the work that is required to bring you closer together.